Planning Your Own Wedding – 5 Tips

1. Keep Christ at the center.

I am aware that there are SO many weddings joining two people who are not necessarily Christians or even “religious.” However, marriage is still intended to be a very serious, godly, reverent, and –quite honestly – God-intended event. Not that you can’t have fun and enjoy it! It is just a huuuuge decision that does not need to be taken lightly. One of the main wishes Justin and I had for our wedding was for it all to be centered on Christ. We wanted our guests to not only see Him working in the ceremony, but even peppered throughout the rest of the day. If it was not for God, Justin and I probably would not have ended up together! We had to get past a lot of our history, and that was all Jesus. So we really wanted to focus on Him and His goodness to us on our big day.

2. Ask for and allow help.

This. Is. Huge. MOST women plan their own weddings. I was one of those people! I planned exactly what I wanted, lined everything up, typed up a VERY detailed outline of the order of events for the day to give to the “day-of” coordinators and photographer, etc. etc. HOWEVER. I could not have gotten everything done if I did not accept assistance and suggestions. You are looking at (or reading the nonsense of) one of the biggest control freaks. I would rather do things myself so that I don’t get upset or disappointed when they aren’t done the way I would have. Controlling everything is not something you want to do if you’re planning your own wedding. Let your mom and aunt go taste-test the coffees for the morning of. Invite multiple people to make the send-off streamers. Let your bridesmaids or any willing party come set up the wedding area the day before. I have an enormous, thankful part of my heart that goes to each and every person who assisted with bringing my plans and my dreams to life on my wedding day. Everything was as I imagined, and I can’t say it was all me. And wouldn’t want to! Accept help, but still insist on it being “you.”

3. Stay calm and don’t let the little things get to you.

I thought I wouldn’t be able to do this, but I did. I was so proud of myself! Yes, a wedding is supposed to be everything you as a couple want and imagine. Still keep in mind that it is just an event (albeit a big event in your life). Things will happen. Plans fall through. It rains. The flower girl has a temper-tantrum. The food gets switched. It. Is. Okay. Things will work out, and you don’t need the extra stress. Roll with it. I am typically a high-strung person when it comes to events. However, I kept “stay calm and enjoy every step of this process” in my mind the entire span leading up to the wedding day. On the wedding day, I still kept this at the forefront of my mind, and continually prayed for peace and a light heart. Because this is a day a couple celebrates!

4. Be one hundred percent “you.”

I cannot stress this enough. In the end, is it what YOU want? Are you staying traditional because YOU want to? Do YOU want to have an intimate wedding? You can’t please everyone. We all learn that early in life. Hopefully, this will be your only wedding! So make it everything you want (within your budget)! I wanted my only sibling standing on MY side on the wedding day (my brother) … and I did, even though it wasn't "the normal!" I didn’t want to spend money on flowers … so I had my bridesmaids carry decorated vintage books down the aisle. I like coffee and brunch food … therefore, I decided on a morning wedding with a coffee bar. Do what you want. Make it scream “you.” People will remember it.

5. Remember to cherish every moment.
This final tip was given to me first by my coworker and sweet friend. It was the first gift I had gotten after I was engaged: The Bride to Be Book: A Journal of Memoriesfrom the Proposal to “I Do.” The book is literally a step-by-step of the wedding planning process, and I am one of those people who filled it out every step of the way. It (and she) reminded me to cherish every single moment. Because if you are stressing about each little detail, you miss it. Relax. Enjoy this wedding planning season you’re in. Keep what matters at the forefront of your priorities. Ask for help. Everything else will work out.

xoxoxo

Bonus tip: Stay organized!

But you just said "roll with it." Yes, I did ... when it comes to little things that you can't change. However, being organized is a HUGE deal prior to and on the big day. I had things booked, planned out, drawn up, typed, and printed long before the day came around. It makes things 101x easier on the wedding day. Type up your list of guest addresses and have multiple people in the family proofread them (you may have forgotten someone!). Put together a detailed outline of how you want the day to flow (including time-frame) and have someone look it over. Then share that outline with your photographer, your day-of coordinator (if you have one), and your DJ. Get your bridesmaids' gifts ahead of time, along with gifts for the mothers. So many details can be thought out and done ahead of time ... don't wait! Stay organized.